Thursday, May 28, 2009

Why The Sotomayor Pick is Brilliant

Wassup, Y'all!

This is the kind of stuff that happens when you have someone with an IQ higher than a potato sitting in the Oval Office. With his selection of Sonia Sotomayor as his first (and hopefully first of many) Supreme Court picks, Smooth Barack has set in motion a chain of events that will have the Hispanic (westside) population trending Democratic for years to come. How? Follow me into the jump, y'all...

When it comes to Supreme Court nominations, y'all know just how it goes. The opposition party does a lot of hemmin' and hawin' and goes out of its way to find reasons why the pick should not be confirmed. In this case, since the opposition party is the Republican party (soon to be known as the Repulsive Party if they don't quit clownin') *and* since the Republicans have a history of shrill, xenophobic, homophobic and sexist knee jerk commentary (i.e. they really don't think through their arguments too well before shootin' off at the mouth with ridiculous statements) you know they're going to be trashin' poor Sista Sonia in the worst ways. And there's the rub, y'all. Westsiders are SKY HIGH over her well deserved nomination and rightly so. Not only does homegirl have a peerless legal resume, but, as Smooth pointed out in his presentation speech, she has a truly American story of hard work leading to high reward.

So this background will be contrast with the crass Republican smear machine that will literally seek to reduce such a well regarded legal mind to a unqualified, activist judge who was only nominated because she was 1) a westsider and 2) a woman. My westside homeys will get to see just how (dis)honorably Republicans will act during this process and how out of touch their views are with the mainstream. I'll bet a tall dollar that by the end of the confirmation process any westsider who identifies with the Republican party now, will be questioning that choice when the dust settles. And that will be all good for 2012, y'all. All good.

The ridiculous Republican jibber-jabber has already started with the likes of Flush Rimjob and Newt Gingrich claimin' that Sista Sonia is a 'racist' and Mike Huckabee (after figuring out what ol girl first name wasn't 'Maria' - too much West Side Story for homey) claim that her seating would turn the Supreme Court into the 'Extreme Court'. The confirmation hearings are going to be MUST SEE TV, y'all. I'm lookin' forward to those joints like a Chicago Style hotdog in the summer.

Got to give it up to Smooth, y'all. He figured out a way to select a supremely qualified Supreme Court nominee, help westsiders realize that southsiders aren't their enemies, teach the nation how to properly pronounce 'Sotomayor' *and* get the westside voting population to see the Republican Party for what it really represents...homogeneous folks out of touch with the changing make up of the country. Well played, Smooth. Well played.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Monday, May 25, 2009

Memorial Day 2009 - Papa Malone


"Cool" Papa Malone
1932-2009

Memorial Day hits home for ol Ty on the real.

Your country thanks you. Your family thanks you. Your son thanks you. Thanks for everything, Pop. Good lookin' out.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Monday, May 18, 2009

Obama Smooths Notre Dame's Feelin's

Wassup, Y'all!

You have to admire that brother. Smooth Barack had *every* reason not to set foot on Notre Dame's campus. Bad PR move, potentially dangerous given how radical Pro-Life folk have become in recent years, no win situation. Put GW Bush in the same position and he'd have conveniently found something equally important to cite as a conflict and reason for not attending. But attend Smooth did - in the midst of the Pro-Life/Pro-Choice controversy - and delivered another thought provoking speech that shows just why he's the right person for the White House...

I can appreciate a President who will engage in debate, discuss topics that are socially difficult and provide thoughtful points for both sides to deliberate. I challenge anyone to view or read that speech and name another politician who could have managed that situation as even-handedly as Smooth did. The Republicans need to take a few notes on how to frame an argument. As Smooth broke it down with respect to arguing opposing views, 'we can do so without reducing those with differing views to caricature'. Amen, my brother. I'm pretty sure Limbaugh, Coulter, Hannity and Malkin will figure out a way to twist that quote into something negative as well. I'm sure they're carving sound-bites from the speech for their broadcasts today with they triflin' a$$es.

I also have to appreciate a President who is consistently seeking opportunities to educate folk on things that may help them check their own views. For the longest, ol Ty has been a serial Notre Dame basher. Touchdown Jesus, Knute Rockney, Fightin' Irish, bladda, bladda, bladda. I guess I'm just not a big fan of spots that come with built in bandwagons and in the midwest, you can find none bigger than Notre Dame. Well a significant part of Smooth's commencement speech focused on Father Ted Hesburgh, former President of Notre Dame. Turns out that 'Father Ted' was also named by President Eisenhower to the six member Civil Rights Commission that ultimate produced the twelve resolutions that would become the famed Civil Rights Act of 1964 (a bill's whose Senate debate brought Martin and Malcolm together for the first and only time). Father Ted proved instrumental in getting the six to overcome their differences and come to a consensus. That's big stuff, y'all. Big stuff.  Stuff that helps me develop a better context of the personalities at Notre Dame and why I shouldn't help the Illuminati with their grand plans (should you not know what the HELL ol Ty is talkin' about - check out the Angels & Demons movie or book - that's a deep plot, jack.)

Bottom line - Smooth again talked about things that needed talkin' about and again reminded folk that, 'we must find a way to live together as one human family'.

Can the church say Amen?

Peace@Least,
Tyrone

Monday, May 11, 2009

Wanda Sykes Rocks, Then Thrown Under Bus

Wassup, Y'all!

Me and 'Tini Mack were chattin' about the merits of Wanda Sykes monologue at the White House Correspondents Association Dinner - we both liked it, particularly the hard crackin' she did on Flush Rimjob. Smooth rocked it as well but Wanda broke it down the way it needed to be broke and because she wasn't the Prez she could pretty much say it the way she wanted. So imagine Ty's upsetness upon hearing that in the wake of the monologue, the White House thought her comments about Rush were inappropriate (in particular that 'he was the 20th 9/11 hijacker who missed his flight because he was strung out on Oxycontin'). You may think that's strong, but remember, this is the fool who said he wanted Obama to fail at his job - which she equated to Rimjob essentially sayin' that he wanted the country to fail. I contend that that comment is not half as irresponsible as 80% of Flush's outragous daily statements.

I know the WH needs to be a little politically correct, but certainly not when it comes to Flush's big, pompous a$$ so Ty's got to drop a BOO on the Smooth White House on this one. BOO! Quit hatin' on Wanda sayin' what other folks are thinkin'.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Saturday, May 09, 2009

Ty's Sweet Tweets

Wassup, Y'all!

I just wanted to let y'all know that not only am I back postin' I'm back Tweetin' via Twitter too. Y'all can follow the exploits on ol Ty's Twitter Feed. I'm droppin' plenty of tweets during the day, y'all - even scooped that Oprah chicken thing that could have gotten you a free grilled 2 piece (no hot pepper or hot sauce tho).  You can either subscribe to the feed or check the sidebar on the right to see what ol Ty's up to.  Don't say I didn't tell you!

Have a great weekend, y'all!

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Smooth Barack's Swagga

Wassup, Y'all!

The other night when I watched Smooth Barack's latest primetime news conference, I noted at the beginning they always have that obligatory long walk down the hallway before steppin' up to the podium and ol Ty further noticed that Smooth was kickin' the 'pimp walk' all the way down. Now before y'all get all up on me about using the term 'pimp' and 'Smooth' in the same sentence, note that this is a southside, non-derogatory term. In this context all it means is a cool walk - all relaxed and what not. George Jefferson had an exaggerated version of it back in the day as did cowboy tough guy John Wayne. These days the new term for 'pimp walk' is 'swagga' and as I came to realize, I'm not the only one noticing Smooth's cool a$$ walk. CNN recently got big time cracked on for devoting air time to 'The Presidential Swagga' and even intro'd the piece with a the M.I.A sample of 'Swagga Like Us'. Can't say that crew ain't desperate for news creative....

If you ask me, things are gettin' pretty superficial, y'all. I see more ink spent on 'Chelle's clothes and hair styles than I do on her remaking of the role of the First Lady by being an active mom, volunteer whirlwind *and* First Lady of the nation. Ol girl does have a degree from Harvard you know - it ain't all about J-Crew and White House / Black Market y'all silly rabbits. But I digress.

I always get a good chuckle from hearing my northside homeys (like CNN's Kyra Phillips) droppin' some southside slang like 'swagga' and 'flava'. To her credit, she almost pulled it off - it wasn't as awkward as if say Betty White or Martha Stewart tried to drop those same terms but it was still awkward. However I like the fact that they aren't afraid to dip into such observations about the cultural differences. Kinda reminds me of that old bit from 'Airplane!' where the brothers are talking their jive and the stewardess needs someone to translate and an old northside woman volunteers. That joint's *still* funny!

We need more of that so our northside homeys won't feel threatened or left out by something that's completely innocent - it's just a part of the culture. So ol Ty is appreciatin' Smooth's swagga and ESPN's Stewart Scott's full body embrace of southside slang on the air and filmmakers who don't water down their southside movies so that everyone can get the gags. 

Case in point, I'm up in the show checking out the trailers before that Nicolas Cage movie, 'Knowing' - it's about 20 northsiders and me. Up pops the trailer to that new joint 'Next Day Air' about some delivery guys who accidently deliver a box of cocaine to the wrong apartment much to the glee of Mike Epps and Wood Harris. It's a straight homeys in the hood comedy and you could have heard the crickets chirping in the theater if I hadn't have been crackin' up  - just me, myself and Ty, y'all. Now if that had been the trailer to 'Pineapple Express' or 'Observe and Report' the whole joint would have been crackin' up - includin' ol Ty - so what's the difference??

Knowledge is power - ain't nothing to be scurred of y'all. We don't bite...except for that ludacris Mike Tyson... Y'all need to be more like the aforementioned Nicolas Cage. See his real name was Nicolas Coppola (of the Coppola family fame). Turns out homey is an avid comic book fan and took his stage name, 'Cage' from the comic book character 'Luke Cage' - one of the few southside superheroes. Homey gets it. We need more of that. Y'all feel me on the real, home slice? Check it.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Monday, May 04, 2009

Terrence Howard: The Crying Game

Wassup, Y'all!

I'm all about dignity and self respect, y'all and I have to admit that ol Ty is feelin' that Terrence Howard is losin' a bit of his like his weak a$$ movie director character in 'Crash' where he's sittin' on the curb while some rogue LAPD officers grope his wife. Yeah - that may be harsh but it seems to me that ol boy cooked his own goose with this Iron Man thing.

For those who missed the actuals factuals on that one, it goes a little something like this: T-How was cast in the first Iron Man movie as Tony Stark's sidekick, Rhodey (a significant part in the comic so it likely would eventually become a significant part in this big money movie franchise). He's the highest paid actor in the movie despite not being the star. Either demands for similar payment for IM2, bad set behavior on IM1 or both caused the movie makers to show him the door. As actors are known to do, they mistakenly assume they're irreplaceable but T-How found out first hand just how replaceable he was when the movie makers decided to recast my main man Don Cheadle for the role and leave T-How a$$ out. *sigh* When will they ever learn?...

This is a common Hollywood story, y'all. Don't get it twisted into a Southside/Northside thing. Northside actors have been gettin' drop kicked the same way. Remember David Caruso who was hotter than the sun fresh off the first season of 'NYPD Blue'? Ol boy got the big head, got dropped from  Season Two and spent some tall years in the casting wilderness before landing a key role in 'CSI: Miami'. His career though will never reach those NYPD Blue heights again. The *only* time this works is if the whole cast is in on the embargo, like that 'Friends' crew. They knew each one of they a$$es could be replaced individually, but there was no way the show could really go on if they all got recast. End result there? Copious Coinage. End result for T-How? A case of Whine with a side helping of The Bitters.

Ol boy needs to be careful before he gets branded 'difficult' and finds himself playin' more roles that WHACK Bah Humbug in 'The Perfect Holiday'. A worse movie character ol Ty has NEVER seen. The only thing that saved that movie from a dreaded ZERO spinners was Charlie Murphy and Kat Williams and they could only bump that joint up to a ONE. A word to the wise T-How from a brother who knows - it's hard out there for a pimp. Stop makin' it harder. Shut up, do your thing and make them regret the decision.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone