Hatin' on Gwen Ifill

Wassup, Y'all!

Now that the polls seem to be shifting back into the blue, expect the Republicans to implement Project Slash and Burn in a final, desperate attempt to again gain the White House, not by earning it on the issues, but by stealing it with character assassination and election day voting chicanery. Since the election is still four weeks away, the character assassination protocol is already underway with sites locked on tonight's Vice Presidential debate moderator Gwen 'Completely In The Tank For Obama' Ifill.

Ol Ty's thoughts on that in a minute, but what's really worked my last nerve is the new Republican attempt to pawn off their culpability in the economic implosion by pointing the finger to a 30 year old piece of housing related legislation designed to help low income workers afford a home. Essentially the developing line on that is the real causes to this current problem are Democrats (since the act passed during the Carter Administration) and minorities (who tend make up the bulk of lower income workers). Wow. If you thought credit was hard to find these days, try looking for shame and accountability from conservative talking heads...

To illustrate just how crazy and polarized politics have become, check out the Wednesday (10/1/08) column from Washington Post conservation columnist Kathleen Parker. Three days earlier, after cringing through Sarah Palin's (Say-Pay) Katie Couric interviews, K-Park finally gave up the conservative charade of insisting that Say-Pay is fit to serve, and wrote a column entitled, 'The Palin Problem' which voiced most of the things rational people were saying about Say-Pay's millimeter depth on complex issues.

The reaction from the right was swift and savage - if she'd have been a southside shorty in 1960's Birmingham her crib would have no doubt been firebombed. Instead one of her more charitable readers emailed her that her mother should have aborted her and left her in a dumpster. And I thought the right was pro-life? This whole Red/Blue political stuff has reached the ridiculous level of European soccer hooliganism, y'all. Anything goes as long as our team wins. We all need to watch Spike's 'Do The Right Thing' a couple more times then check into an Arizona meditation clinic for about a decade.

So you knew what was coming once poll numbers started to drop for hockey mom Say-Pay since folks are actually getting a chance to listen to her non-studio produced, 'unplugged' album material. Instead of being accountable and saying, 'yeah, you're right - we could have done better with about a hundred other strong, female Republican candidates'. You get slight of hand and misdirection in the form of Shorty Gwen Ifill. Shorty Gwen is in the process of writing a book titled, 'The Breakthrough: Politics and Race in the Age of Obama', described as a survey of, '...the American political landscape, shedding new light on the impact of Barack Obama's stunning presidential campaign and introducing the emerging young African American politicians forging a bold new path to political power'.

One thing is undeniable about Smooth Barack's candidacy - it's changed the game forever and I believe that the focus of the book is just how it has changed the game for up and coming southside politicians (both Democrat and Republican). The Republican spin is that Shorty Gwen is in the tank for Obama and if Say-Pay has a bad night, it will be not because she's a potato head but because she was set up by Shorty Gwen who clearly has a Democratic agenda. No shame. No accountability. Here's Shorty Gwen's thoughts on this ruckus.

Lastly, returning to this blame shifting for the economic meltdown. The false logic goes like this, because in 1977, Democrats passed, '...the Community Reinvestment Act of 1977', an act, 'intended to encourage depository institutions to help meet the credit needs of the communities in which they operate, including low- and moderate-income neighborhoods, consistent with safe and sound operations', some extreme conservatives would have you believe that this put undue pressure on mortgage lending institution like Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac to lend money in an unsafe fashion to people who they knew would not or could not pay it back. Read the article and determine for yourself why I consider that some very false logic.

Still, on his show on Tuesday, Rush Limbaugh had the nerve to equate this to 'reparations'. By that I took his meaning to be since southsiders will never shut up about getting reparations from the government for their early mistreatment as slaves (which ol Ty is not on board with - I accepted the apology already given - no blood money required) the Democrats concocted a scheme to get them low cost mortgages on homes they couldn't afford instead and by so doing, caused this economic calamity we now find ourselves in. No shame. No accountability.

After nearly crashing the hoopty, I had to ask myself, 'Ty? Are you being like 'Cougar' in 'Top Gun' and holding on too tight? Are you losing your edge? Your objectivity?' Maybe so, y'all and feel free to call a brother out if you think so as well. All I know is that this type of ruckus is enough to make ol Ty catch a Racial Tension Headache. Yo Queen! Pass a brother some of that Excedrin RTH!...

Anyway - T-90 minutes 'til the debate. Getcha popcorn ready!

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Beware the Ides of Palin

Wassup, Y'all!

Okay, tomorrow's debate won't actually fall in either March or the Ides of October (October 15th), but as superstitious as ol Ty is, I think Smokin' Joe Biden (and by extension the Smooth Barack campaign) needs to be alert for the Sarah Palin (Say-Pay) okey-doke. Let me explain...

Back in the day, 44 BC to be exact, Julius Caesar was so sure of himself that he decided to anoint himself Rome's 'Dictator for Life'. A soothsayer on Caesar's staff (the precusor to pollsters, y'all) warned him that he would be at great peril on the 'Ides of March', which happened to be the same day he had planned an innocent Senate meeting. At the meeting, Caesar's Senate colleagues felt he had overstepped his bounds and promptly stabbed his a$$ to death (see the associated glossy). Lesson learned? Everything is not always as it seems. Said another way related to the vice presidential debate, Say-Pay can't be the dimmest bulb in the Republican box - if so, how'd she become a state governor? If not, wouldn't now be the perfect time for her real coming out party?

I know, I know - I'm being silly. We've all seen the Katie Couric interview, the Miss Alaska pageant footage of 'Sarah Heath's' swimsuit walk (why no questioning of Say-Pay now about how sexist beauty pageants are? Swimsuit and high heels? Maybe it's just me...) and flute talent performance, the dead-on SNL sketches, Citizen McCain spirited defense of her Obama-esque Pakistan comment, but here's a little something you probably haven't seen yet, snippets from Say-Pay's previous gubernatorial debates. Ol girl's not half bad when she knows what's coming. Given how low the expectations are for Say-Pay, if she gives a fair performance, it could help stem Smooth's growin' momentum.

Not sure just how ol Ty got this superstitious (also known as Florida Recount Paranoia or FRP), but there's a little too much positive news for me to be happy. No, ol Ty is wary, y'all. I'm sensin' the okey-doke just around the corner and what Trojan Moose Horse would be better to spring it than a flute playin', hockey mom from the Great North, ya knooow? Returning to our cautionary tale of confident Caesar strollin to an innocent Senate meeting, he remarked to his soothsayer, 'The Ides of March have come' (you dummy and I'm still breathing), to which the crafty soothsayer replied, 'Aye, Caesar, but not gone'... Cue the spooky music.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

St. Anna Can't Muster A Box Office Miracle

Wassup, Y'all!

Little under the weather today, y'all after a weekend road trip to Michigan. I noted with some disappointment that Spike Lee's new joint - Miracle at St. Anna - only got middle of the road reviews and end of the road box office receipts this weekend. Spike's WWII drama only managed about $3.5 million this weekend and barely clocked into the weekend Top Ten at #9. Somewhere you have to believe that Clint Eastwood is mildly amused.

Ol Ty will have to accept some culpability in the weak numbers as I didn't make it out to a weekend showing. I had the best intentions but 50% of my crew was under the weather and there was a bit of disagreement among the crew on whether to take in 2 hours and 40 minutes of war action or see a comedy to help get over the wet blankets known as the economic 'rescue plan', millionaire Citizen McCain and his ward Say-Pay. Later in the day, I got a good laugh on with the SNL opening spoofing Say-Pay's recent interview with Katie Couric. Man, Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are national comedy treasures, jack.

So before I pop off too much on MaSA's weak debut, I'll need to get out to see that bad boy - hopefully today if I can get some fast acting, non-drowsy cold medicine down.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Walk, Chew Gum, Debate

Wassup, Y'all!

Wow. What's it like to be Smooth Barack and have to continually deal with extraordinary political maneuvering by opponents? I thought we'd seen the kitchen sink in the Democratic Primary when Sister Hillary threatened to hijack the process when her focus suddenly went from earned delegates to 'will of the people' in order to seize the nomination through the backdoor. Now, at the eleventh hour before the first presidential debate, we have Citizen McCain planning to blow off the debate under the guise of 'puttin' country first' as he rides to the rescue of an economic deal that's already mostly put together...

I'm happy to see that polls show that more than 80% of the people footing this economic bailout bill want to see the debate go on, I'm happy to see that the Commission on Presidential Debates wants to see the debate go on, I'm happy to see that Smooth Barack wants the debate to go and finally, I'm happy to see that the reaction to Citizen's hasty move is that rather than it being 'presidential' and 'putting country first' the move smacks of desperation and political gamesmanship. I also heard some chicken cluckin' goin' on from a couple shortys I know so y'all can draw your own conclusions on that.

Just based on the two news conferences given yesterday by Smooth and Citizen, you have to think that an event that has both men standing and talking side by side will not go well for Citizen just on appearance alone. But moving beyond the superficial, Smooth looked, well...smooth, making his statement and then taking questions from the press - something both Citizen and Say-Pay seem allergic to. It looked like a White House press conference without the White House press room backdrop. Ol boy was pointin' to reporters, answering questions and staying cool and steady under fire. He was also the candidate that dropped the best line yesterday when he pointed out that Americans expect their presidents to be able to multi-task and focus on more than one thing at a time. Like Iraq *and* Afghanistan. Like the economy *and* national security. Y'all get where I'm comin' from.

Hopefully the debate will go on (though it doesn't seem likely) and there won't be a delay in the VP debate as well as we all want to see Say-Pay show her presidential qualities since everyone's insisting that she has them. As I've said from the beginning of the race - you can't say that this joint is dull. This joint has more twists and turns than '24'.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

'Miracle at St. Anna': All Systems Go

Wassup, Y'all!

Testosterone fueled WWII action? Check. Southside eye-candy for the ladies in the form of Michael Ely, Derek Luke and Laz Alonzo? Check. Good box office cash and critical buzz from his last movie? Check. As previously, reported by ol Ty back in May, all systems are go for Spike Lee's newest movie, 'Miracle at St. Anna' which drops this Friday, September 26th.

In an interesting pre-review of the movie, Roger Ebert spent some time talkin' to Spike about the motivation and history of the movie. Similar to the story of the Tuskegee Airmen, which followed the exploits of the southside 99th Fighter Squadron which eventually joined with the southside 332 Fighter Group in flying highly successful sorties in both the North African and European WWII theaters, Miracle at St. Anna follows the exploits of four southside American soldiers who are part of the Army's all-southside 92nd Infantry Division (aka The Buffalo Soldiers) stationed in Tuscany, Italy during World War II...

Unknown to me in all this is the role former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt had in making it possible for southsiders to even serve in WWII. Apparently, she felt strongly about the issue and spent much of her time lightin' a fire under husband Franklin's a$$ to get him to approve the move. If ever there was a First Lady fit to be President (and this is no crack on Sister Hillary - I'm just sayin') it was Eleanor. Ol girl even put her money where her mouth was by going up in a plane piloted by a Tuskegee Airmen at their Tuskegee, Alabama training field.

Also unknown to me were the details of the opening battle in the movie (a true WWII battle) where the Buffalo Soldiers were crossing the Serchio River and get caught in a cross fire with the Germans on one side and friendly fire from their American comrades on the other side who rained down artillery fire on their position despite being given the proper firing coordinates because the artillary commander didn't believe that a group of southside soldiers could 'advance that far, that fast'. *Sigh* Don't get me started...

One final point that Spike made that made an impression on me was what he considered real patriotism. He said, "I think it takes even more of a patriot to fight when you’re still being lynched in the Jim Crow south. These black men weren’t enlisted, they signed up. You want to fight for the red, white and blue, and most of the black troops were trained in the south. You’re being trained to kill Nazis. On the same base where you’re being trained, you see Nazi POWs who are getting better housing, better food and better health care. Wow, how’d that make you feel?" So it really is more than lapel flag pins and small town values - who knew?

Wow - can't say it better than that. Needless to say, I'll be in the back row with my popcorn and Twizzlers. Drop some ducats on this one, y'all - no bootlegs! Maa fact - you might want to think about gettin' the book and gettin' all the actual factuals on this little known aspect of our history. Just thinkin' out loud on that one, y'all...

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Rusty Steel Magnolia: Condi Rice Drops A Tear?

Wassup, Y'all!

Caught this piece yesterday while skimmin' news since it seemed completely out of character. Apparently in a new book titled, 'Angler' - a biography about Dick Cheney ('Angler' is his Secret Service code name. Who knew? I thought 'Buckshot' would have been more appropriate) a section relates to an incident where Donald Rumsfeld twice openly defied a request by Condoleeza Rice to attend her meeting to discuss how to handle the military tribunals that the Bush Administration was pushin' to try suspected terrorists being held at Guantanamo. According to the author, Condi-Girl got so upset at the slight and his open disregard for her position that she started crying...

Now we all know that when new books come out, there is invariably some new, salacious, never-before-heard tidbit that the publisher passes along to generate interest. A lot of times the information is discounted or discredited after a million copies fly off the shelves but you never know. Regardless, if it is true - do we really need to hear about the only female in a position of power in the Bush Administration crying? That's bush league - I'm sure most of the boyz in GW's administration have had their moments too (except Chaney - you actually need a working heart to feel the need to cry, y'all) - given the catastrophy with the 'War on Terror' and now, the implosion of the financial industry which will require a 'free market, no regulation' Republican Administration to preside over the largest government bailout of any industry in the nation's history. If GW's not cryin' over that it's only because he'll be out of office in 118 days and he'll be able to leave that foul mess to the poor sap headed in behind him. Wow - ol Ty is all for Smooth Barack but I have to admit, the next person in the Oval Office is gonna have about a millisecond long honeymoon before people start calling for his head - folks are hurtin' out here, jack. 'Course if Smooth gets in, the northsiders from that AP-Yahoo poll will chalk it up to his being an incompetent, lazy, boastful southsider who's not trying hard enough, but I think we all agree that any conversation that includes those adjectives begins and ends with GW.

So, to this nonsense about Condi-Girl droppin' a tear when going up against the good ol boys ol Ty says, 'So'? If they didn't care about the feelings of the nation, she had to know that they certainly weren't carin' about hers, but regardless I gotta give her a snap up for at least feeling so passionately about the issue that it got to that point. I know one shorty who's gonna be on the beach for about a year when they finally turn the lights out on GW's ill-advised tenure - no doubt.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Elephant Outed: Why The Election is Really So Close

Wassup, Y'all!

Since Smooth Barack's journey began in Springfield like a million years ago (actually February '07) the quiet buzz within the southside nation was this: 'Northsiders will never let a southsider get elected President of the United States'. That became the elephant in the room that got alluded to when the specter of Rev. J-Wright appeared - a series of events which culminated in Smooth giving his well received speech on race in Philly in heat of that storm. Then things died down for a few until the Democratic nomination race reached hysterical levels and disturbin' details emerged about the racial proclivities of a large component of Sister Hillary's support - less educated, northside democrats.

Cynical southsiders quickly jumped up and said, 'See? Didn't we tell, y'all?' But that argument held little water as Smooth went on to actually win the Democratic nomination. Optimistic southsiders began to think that we had turned the corner and that in an election where past and current events screamed that a change in direction (and political party) was in order, it seemed that *any* Democratic nominee would win the election in a walk. Now with data in hand from an extensive AP-Yahoo poll that sought to measure actual northside feelings toward southsiders, the results provide sobering evidence that though Smooth Barack won the battle for the Democratic Presidental nomination, he may well lose the war for the White House on some triflin' a$ bull$hit...

Now before I get to the actual factuals on this, please excuse my colorful language, but in ol Ty's view, the findings in the poll are more than enough to either 1) work a brother's *last* nerve or 2) make a brother catch a case - either way, ol Ty needs to take a chill pill before he falls out. Okay, on with the sad a$$ show. The poll revealed the following:

• 1/3 of northside democrats harbor negative views toward southsiders
• 40% of all northside Americans hold at least a partly negative view toward blacks, and that includes many Democrats and independents
• More than a third of all northside Democrats and independents agreed with at least one negative adjective about southsiders and they are significantly less likely to vote for Smooth Barack than those who don't have such views
• Just seven in 10 people who call themselves Democrats (particularly non-Hispanic northside voters) support Smooth Barack, compared to the 85% of self-identified Republicans who back McCain
• Given a choice of several positive and negative adjectives that might describe southsiders, 20% of all northsiders said the word "violent" strongly applied. Among other words, 22% agreed with "boastful," 29% "complaining," 13% "lazy" and 11% "irresponsible" When asked about positive adjectives, northsiders were more likely to stay on the fence than give a strongly positive assessment [Ty: although they did say we could dance 'real good']
  
• More than a quarter of northside Democrats agree that "if [southsiders] would only try harder, they could be just as well off as [northsiders]"
• Among northside independents, racial stereotyping is not uncommon. For example, while about 20% of independent voters called southsiders "intelligent" or "smart," more than one third latched on the adjective "complaining" and 24% said southsiders were "violent"
• Just 59% of [Sister Hillary's] northside Democratic supporters said they wanted [Smooth Barack] to be president. Nearly 17% of Sister Hillary's northside backers plan to vote for Citizen McCain
• Among northside Democrats, Sister Hillary supporters were nearly twice as likely as Smooth Barack backers to say at least one negative adjective described southsiders well, a finding that suggests many of her supporters in the primaries — particularly northsiders with high school education or less — were motivated in part by racial attitudes
  

One talkative member of that last crew was quoted as saying, 'We still don't like black people". This heartfelt comment was from John Clouse, 57 who was reflecting the sentiments of his pals gathered at a coffee shop in Somerset, Ohio. Hmmm...bet you can't find a single white sheet when you go to the Wal-Mart Bath and Bedroom department in Somerset.

What makes this poll more far reaching (and in ol Ty's view much more accurate) it that it gathered input from folks who were first screen via phone but who were then allowed to answer these touchy questions online. My boyz and I long speculated that other polls, where you would have to verbally acknowledge your racism to a real person, would not be accurate and skew the real results in a more positive direction. You always get better results when you let someone do their dirty in the dark.

The poll also, 'broke ground by incorporating images of black and white faces to measure implicit racial attitudes, or prejudices that are so deeply rooted that people may not realize they have them. That test suggested the incidence of racial prejudice is even higher, with more than half of [northsiders] revealing more negative feelings toward [southsiders] than [northsiders]'.

Lastly, the survey also highlighted something that caught ol Ty completely off guard. It was the fact that, 'Race is not the biggest factor driving Democrats and independents away from [Smooth Barack]. Doubts about his competency loom even larger, the poll indicates. More than a quarter of all Democrats expressed doubt that [Smooth Barack] can bring about the change they want, and they are likely to vote against him because of that'

Wow - a Harvard grad and Constitutional Law professor not competent enough to run the country? That background seems to more than match up with Sister Hillary or Citizen McCain who graduated near the bottom of his Naval Academy class or Say-Pay who went to five colleges in six years. I wonder what's driving that notion?

Though these results are in no way surprising to southsiders, let ol Ty give credit where credit is really due. We know, given where Smooth is today, that not all northsiders are prejudiced. In fact, the survey also indicated that, 'more [northsiders] say good things about [southsiders] than say bad things...And many [northsiders] who see [southsiders] in a negative light are still willing or even eager to vote for [Smooth]'. I even have good northside friends who like southsiders, y'all so I can vouch for that one :-)

I think Donna Brazile said it best yesterday when asked to reflect on these poll results (which indicate that these views could be effecting Smooth's poll numbers by as much as 6%). Ol girl said, forget about the 1/3 that has these views and is a lost cause and focus on the 2/3 that have been active and avid supporters. I'd have to agree. It's gonna take more that 50 some odd days to sway those other minds (if they can ever be swayed) so let the elephant out of the closet, acknowledge its effect and move on. Time is short.

Sorry to run so long, y'all but mama said ol Ty needed to vent on this one so that he'd be able to live to type another day.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

America! Listen to Luda - Open Your Eyes

Wassup, Y'all!

Runnin' on autopilot this morning, since I have an early date with the devil but I wanted to drop a quick email that Lady E. forwarded to me yesterday titled, 'Sad But True - America Today'. It's an indictment of how trivialized some folk have made this election despite the dire predicament the country finds itself in today. Encouragingly, recent polls continue to indicate that sensical folk are beginning to take things a lot more seriously, but the fact that much of the following rings true is a sad indication of just how superficial some folk have become. If you find yourself shakin' your head at some of the ridiculousness that follows - as you've seen me report a few months back, this is likely the leading culprit for this kind of thinking...

If you're a Democrat who has been in the Senate for two years, you are a Washington 'insider'. If you're a Republican who has been in the Senate for 26 years, you are a Washington 'outsider'

If you're a northsider, win a beauty contest, attended 5-6 colleges before finally graduating , join the PTA, are voted to be mayor by 1000 people, govern a sparsely populated state for almost two years, and randomly get chosen at the last minute to be VP, you've 'lived the American dream '. If you're a southsider , raised by a single mother, lived on food stamps, help the community, get into Harvard, become the first southside editor of the Harvard Law Review, and are voted the presidential nominee by millions of people, you are 'uppity' (or 'elite').

If you live in an urban area and you get a girl pregnant, you're a 'baby daddy'. If you're the same in Alaska, you're a 'teen father'.

If you are born in the 50th state of the union and got a passport at birth, you are too 'cosmopolitan' and let the 'corruption of European ideals affect your judgment'. If you grew up in the 49th state to enter the union, and never had a passport until 2007, you are a 'true patriot of America'.

Southside teen pregnancy? A 'crisis' in America. Northside teen pregnancy? A 'blessed event'.

If you grow up in Hawaii, you're 'exotic'. If you grow up in Alaska, you're the quintessential 'American story'.

If you think it's okay to shoot wolves from helicopters, you're just an average American hockey mom having some fun. If you try to ensure those wolves are treated humanely, you are out of touch with the average American

If you name your kid ' Barack', you're 'unpatriotic'. If you name your kid 'Track ', you're 'colorful'

A Democrat who doesn't fully vet a VP is 'reckless'. A Republican who doesn't fully vet a VP is a 'maverick'.

Get 18 million people to vote for you in a national presidential primary, you're a 'phony'. Get 100,000+ people to vote you governor of the 47th most populous state in the Union, you're 'well loved'.

If you manage a multi-million dollar nationwide campaign, you are an 'empty suit'. If you are a part time mayor of a town of 7000 people, you are an 'experienced executive'.

If you cheated on your first wife with an heiress, you're a 'Christian'. If you have been married to the same woman for 19 years, you're 'risky'.

If you are biracial, America needs 2 damn years and 3 major speeches to 'get to know you'. If you're a northsider, America needs 36 minutes and 38 seconds worth of an acceptance speech to know you're 'one of us'.

If you give your wife a fist-tap on stage, it's a 'terrorist fist jab'. If your daughter licks her palm so that she can slick down your youngest child 's hair on national TV it's an 'adorable moment'. [Alright, hold up - that was cute...]

If your pastor rails against inequality in the United States of America, you're an 'extremist'. If your pastor welcomes a sermon by Jews for Jesus, who preach that the killing of Jews by terrorists is a lesson to Jews that they must convert to Christianity, you're a 'fundamentalist'.

If you' re 18, a northsider, and get a 16 year old girl pregnant 'life happens'. If you' re 18, a southsider, and impregnate a 16 year old girl, you're a 'registered sex offender'.

If you're a Republican and you talk to America's enemies, it's 'diplomacy'. If you're a Democrat and you talk to America's enemies, it's 'appeasement'.

If you're a Republican you think women should vote for a female candidate because you share the same biology, regardless of her stand on issues. If you're a Democrat and you vote for a woman who shares your ideology, you're 'playing the gender card'.

If you are a conservative and reveal that your son will be deployed on Sept. 11, but that is only the date of the deployment ceremony, you are the mother of a patriot who is doing the best to confuse the terrorists and protect the troops being sent over. If you are a democrat and announce the same thing, you would be accused of pandering to the public and trying to garner public emotion through a lie.

If you're a Republican and you don't wear a flag pin you're a 'maverick'. If you're a Democrat and you don't wear a flag pin, you're 'unpatriotic'.

If you're a Republican senator who solicits gay sex in an airport bathroom, you get to return to your job in the Senate and are encouraged to run for re-election. If you're a Democratic Senator having an affair, your political career is over and your wife who has terminal cancer is to blame.

If Bush agrees to a set date of troops leaving Iraq it is called 'horizons'. If Obama calls for a set date of troops to leave Iraq, with the blessing of the Iraq government , it is called 'timetables', 'endangering our troops','cut and run' and 'wanting to lose the war for political purposes'.

If you spend 3 years as a community organizer growing your organization from a staff of 1 to 13 and your budget from $ 70,000 to $ 400,000, then become the first black President of the Harvard Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers 150,000 new African American voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law professor, then spend nearly 8 years as a State Senator representing a district with over 750,000 people, becoming chairman of the state Senate's Health and Human Services committee, then spend nearly 4 years in the United States Senate representing a state of nearly 13 million people, sponsoring 131 bills and serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works and Veteran's Affairs committees, you are 'woefully inexperienced'. If you spend 4 years on the city council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with less than 7,000 people, then spend 20 months as the governor of a state with 650,000 people, then you are ' well qualified' to lead the nation.

Shame, shame...

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Ty's Liking Smooth Barack's new 'speed and ferocity'

Wassup, Y'all!

The old saying goes that the best defense is a strong offense and if past days are any indication, the Smooth campaign is now reaching deep into their offensive playbook. Citizen McCain's five point lead in the polls has evaporated as he finds himself on the receivin' end of a daily barrage of body blows challenging him on everything from his questionable economic aptitude to his willingness to allow his campaign to continue airing negative ads that are blatantly misleading.

You can't hit the dial these days without hearing Smooth or one of his surrogates lightin' a fire under Citizen's a$$ and it all seems to be workin' his last nerve. It's been a well known fact that Citizen could use a couple anger management classes to help keep him on an even keel, and to ol Ty's eye, it seems that's ultimately what this new offensive strategy is designed to do - wear him out, make him mad and give him the rope to hang his own campaign.

Citizen aside, I was also heartened by the fact that the Smooth campaign is also hot on the heels of all this impending GOP voter shenanigans, leaving no underhanded tactic unchallenged. On Monday I gave a holler about this madness going on in Michigan to use home foreclosure lists to mount voter challenges on election day. Now news has reached the basement that that ruckus is going to be challenged in court.

For the next Smooth offensive play I'd like to see them run the old 'Slot right hot, double shift, 44 50 IQ zero' on two, which translated for the fellas down at Winky's Corner Store means - get Sarah Palin back in front of the press (or Carly Fiorina for that matter...). In the meantime, you can find me down at Winky's takin' bets on the exact day that Citizen will go the hell off. Ol boy's already simmerin'.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone

Condi Finally Realizes She's From The Southside

Wassup, Y'all!

Better late than never I always say. Black folk (aka southsiders) are notorious for two things 1) forgetting where they came from once they become successful and 2) calling out our more successful brothers and sisters for forgetting where they came from once they get successful. The poster children for behavior #1 are Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas and southside turncoat Ward Connerly. Of course there are many, many others but these two brothers epitomize the trend so well, I plan to update their Wikipedia entries to include a reference to famous Revolutionary War traitor Benedict Arnold...

Now Condoleeza Rice (Condi-Girl) (seen above at her recent southside re-induction ceremony) is a bit of an enigma here. When the Bush administration began its reign of terror in 2001 it was populated with two high profile southsiders, Colin Powell (Pow-Wow) and Condi-Girl. Southsiders across the country openly wondered how they could manage to sneak the Drop Squad inside the White House gates to reclaim them both but to this day, could never get that figured out. Happily, in 2004 Pow-Wow woke up in the morning screaming, 'Oh snap! I'm working for GW!' and promptly quit. Condi-Girl on the other hand, waved a fond farewell to Pow-Wow from the White House portico and promptly took his job.

Southside strategist figured the cause was lost, some even started an irresponsible whisper campaign floating the idea that Condi-Girl and GW were sleepin' together but, in the end, ol girl remained firmly entrenched in the administration. Now word reaches the basement that a little while ago, Condi-Girl was roamin' the halls of the State Department, looked up from her briefing papers and realized, 'Oh snap! I'm the only southsider here!' It may have taken seven years, but our girl has finally hit her 'aha moment'. Yes, she's gonna need a lot of reconditioning, tough love and understanding when she stumbles from the White House in January but ol Ty is happy to report that the southside cultural experts believe that she can once again become a welcomed and productive member of the southside nation. Which is cool since ol Ty has always kinda had a thing for Condi-Girl.

Now on the flip side, a lot of my southside homeys and homettes have been exhibiting a ton of behavior #2 on my boy Smooth Barack, claiming among other things that homey 'isn't black enough'. Let me put that foolishness to bed once and for all. First, Smooth passes the 'One Drop' test with flying colors. Second, and most importantly, since this provides incontrovertible proof that Smooth is a southsider, he went on public record stating that he never would have nominated Clarence Thomas to the Supreme Court. There. Quit hatin', y'all.

Peace@Least,

Tyrone