My bad for being away so long. You know old Tyrone took the election pretty hard. Just when you think you can trust Florida, here comes that 'hi' in the middle state. I been licking my wounds down at Winky's with the fellas, plottin' strategy for 2006. The revolution's still being televised, y'all! Today's Boondocks about sums up my feelings on that joint. In the future, I hope to have guest bloggers drop by while I'm vacationing cuz I know y'all be missing my daily dose - sho you right.
Now on with the show. In happier political news, our boy Smooth Barack is on Capitol Hill today grooving through 'freshman' orientation. Awwww yeah, y'all. Remember Freshman O on campus? A new class of fresh shorties every year... It was a simpler, more happy time. If y'all remember the TV movie Keep the Faith, Baby about Adam Clayton Powell's move to Washington as a freshman congressman from his "kingdom of Harlem", you can pretty much imagine the fun Smooth Barak is having adding some much needed contrast to the Harvard & Yale Boys Club of America aka the U.S. Senate. Of course the best part of that movie was my girl Vanessa Williams and her fine self (note to Rick - You Dummy!). It was also interesting to note that ACP built his momentum to get to congress by backdooring A. Philip Randolph for the nomination. But hey - as we now know - that's politics, baby. For y'all brothers down at Winky's corner store talkin' 'bout A. Philip Who? - Check out his story in 10,000 Black Men Named George on DVD or video - know your history, y'all!
Speaking of Powells - our boy Colin finally got it right, renounced the Dark Side and joined the revolution today. It's bittersweet though y'all as our girl Condoleeza has now been completely seduced by the Dark Side. I had to work my Chocolate City contacts to grab her upcoming official State Department glossy. It ain't pretty y'all....
If you thought those European homeys were nervous before wait until they get the feel of C-Rice's light staff up they backside. Old girl don't play and that ain't even an exaggeration. Shoot France and Germany might as well get to bending over right now....
Alright, alright - man can't live on politics alone and your boy Tyrone is here to drop some dessert on y'all. I happen to wander my way into that new Selma Hayek flick After The Sunset and I'm still trying roll my tongue back into my head. Daaaaaaaaamn! That's right y'all. Selma pulled a 10 'A' Damn performance. Man - I knew old girl was fine, but I had no idea she was fooooine (note to Ed - You Dummy!)! That movie was a showcase for the hotty with body where a jewel heist accidently broke out. I'm installing Senorita Selma as this week's Shorty of the Week (and check out my column from August 24th to make sure you feel me on this one), but I was also woofing on Naomie Harris. She previously starred in that living dead flick 28 Days Later and you will hardly recognize her. The island ambiance did old girl a world of good. Here's a glossy so you can confirm my actual factuals.
Fellas - you'd be wise to check it out while it's still on the BIG screen. Even though DVD's give you the ability to pause and rewind (even those instant bootleg joints you can get at Winky's), there's no substitute for seeing Selma and Naomi on the 20' x 30' widescreen (unless you're Shaq y'all know you ain't rolling like that in the crib). 'ear me now, rude bwhy!