Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Doin' The Butt - Maybe soccer's not so bad...

Wassup, Y'all!

Remember 'Go Go' music back in the day? 'Member Trouble Funk and that classic from D.C.'s E.U. (the group my boy turned me on to) Da Butt that was featured in Spike Lee's movie 'School Daze'? Well, I admit to watching the World Cup finale and after a boring a$$ 90+ minutes + overtimes ended in a 1-1 tie before going to the penalty kick tiebreaker, all that time was rewarded by a single moment as the players were jaw-jacking and milling around - the head butt heard 'round the world. In NFL parlance, it's known as a 'de-cleater' or a hit so perfectly vicious that it knocks a player off his feet (cleats) onto his back. French soccer star Zinedine Zidane put a little soccer twist on this by headbutting an opposing player in the chest so hard that he de-cleated him (the fact that the opposing player alledgedly called out homeboy's mama and sister make the hit even sweeter...). So now all the sudden, soccer has a cool, new move and maybe a few new viewers next season if this catches on vs. those weak a$$ slide tackles that has opposing players floppin' and crying like girls...

Time will tell, but I for one would like to see similar moves developed for the NBA which really hasn't yet developed a signature de-cleater move for opposing players who finally get on your last damn nerve. Sure Raj Bell had that sweet yolk he dropped on Kobe but that's more like wrestling. I'm talkin' 'bout a one hit move that just knocks an opposing player the fu*k out.

The video game "NBA Street 2" has a sweet move called 'Off the Heezy' where you bounce the ball off an opponent's head to get your dribble back. How 'bout a little tweak to that - like whaling the ball off an opponent's mug, perhaps? Or maybe a bounce pass to the crotch? I'll keep chewin' it over for a few, but clearly a tight move like that would make the game even more popular and serve as an exciting way to get those pesky players (like those dropping threes on your boyz with regularity) out of the game.

Until that time, I suggest using Kobe for practice until the NBA de-sneaker is perfected, y'all.

Can I get a witness?



No comments: