That's right - it's two for one night here at the Malone crib. It wouldn't be responsible for me to close tonight without addressing everyone's favorite guilty pleasure - no not those tasty Pecan Turtles, y'all, I'm talking about The Apprentice - Season 2 that wrapped last night. Raise your hand if the outcome shocked you. Hold 'em up now and let me count...240 million in the country and I see about three hands up...and two are mine... I think that other one belongs to Boo Boo, the fool...
Man, please. Me and the boyz checked out the very first episode and while the opening credits were rolling I turned to my boy Tater Tot and asked who he thought was going to win and he said "The white boy", without blinking an eye. You got to give it up to Donald Trump (T-Money) - he knows how to keep the status quo popping in American's board rooms. What's the world coming to when a smoking blonde shorty with a platinum pedigree can't even make the cut? And this from over a million (according to T-Money) applicants. I guess we need to look forward to our own reality show called "The Middle Manager on the Bubble" cuz we won't be seeing the inside of T-Money's real boardroom any time soon. See if I were T-Money, I'd also have to drop that straight-laced Carolyn Kepcher and go with that freaky shorty Ivana! If she's motivated enough to drop her skirt on a busy New York street corner, old girl has what it takes to make it anywhere.
Good news, y'all! Affiliates are signing up for the upcoming Tyra Banks talk show this fall. Okay - it's only one for now, but I'm smelling momentum building. It' s good to know that our homeys in Portland, Oregon already know what time it is. For the rest of you, let me drop a glossy (and there are sooo many to choose from) on you and ask: "What's your hold up?" Call your local stations and get out the vote - dummies!
Now as I close tonight, I'd be remiss if I didn't share the love (and spotlight) with another Shorty on The Rise. You'll note back in my December 4th column I gave a similar nod to up and coming Shorty Brooklyn Sudano. This go round, I share the glossy of former Hilfiger model Joy Bryant.
Y'all keen observers will remember old girl from The Antwone Fisher Story (homeboy's girlfriend) and more recently the movie Honey with Shorty Supreme Jessica Alba (she played homegirl's girlfriend... hmmm a trend emerges...). She's still trying to break out and is next due up in the movie Skeleton Key due next year. Keep an eye peeled, y'all. She's another slim goody who has the chops to go long.