Friday, December 17, 2004

Paging Boo Boo The Fool

Wassup, Y'all!

Sorry for the late posting - it's not my style to deprive the needy! I've been dippin' and dodgin' but managed to slap together a few tasty morsels for y'all's edification. So cop a squat and get your grub on. First up we have our Commander-in-Chief GW spending some more of the "political capital" he earned by nominating Bernie "Little Gotti" Kerik for the open Homeland Secretary slot. What's the deal with this nanny business trippin' up so many nominees? How hard is it hard to 1) make sure your nanny is a legal immigrant and 2) make sure you pay your nanny legitimately? Who does Bernie think we are? Boo Boo the fool? Please. Old boy probably snuck her over the border his damn self and then offered to pay her with a couple of weekly jimmy sammiches. Now it turns out that with a little more scratching (which GW's boys were too tired to do from all that post election partying) Little Gotti was tippin' (out) and tappin'(booty) when he got the feeling for the flavor. Shame, Shame. So I'm like hmmm, what attracted GW to Little Gotti in the first place? Rudy G.? The hard luck All-American poor-boy-makes-good story? Nah. I'm thinking it's the fact that Little Gotti made $6 million without investing a penny of his own money. Hey wait a minute...didn't GW make a little cake using that same method? Turns out Little Gotti graduated summa cum laude from the GW School of Magic Money Making (No money down, y'all!). Yeah - Bernie got lucky on the stock options to a stun gun company with a government contract... And all this from a *little* scratching of the surface...

Hey - what a difference a week makes for our troops in harm's way. Our boy D Rumsfeld (D-Rum to his boys and
who just got his tenth vote of confidence from GW) has got the Army in gear now, y'all. Turns out they're spending $4.1 billion to put armor on all military
wheeled vehicles!! That's so nice - and timely too! We've only been fighting for a couple years now and only have around 10,000 wounded soldiers and over 1,000 KIA. I'm sure they received the news warmly both here and in the hereafter. Knuckleheads! If you're gonna send 'em, PROTECT 'em! What I find interesting as well is how is it a $20 Improvised Explosive Device (IED) can inflict such damage on our *best equipped* fighting forces in the world? Where's all that Defense budget going? Must be our Missile Defense Shield... When GW and D-Rum speak, Boo Boo the fool listens...

The last act of our three act "Boo Boo the fool" play is played by our favorite Louisiana Judge Timothy Ellender got busted for wearing a jail jumpsuit, handcuffs and afro wig and blackface to a Halloween party. Apparently, he arrived at the party without the blackface, but the party's host - his brother - dressed as Buckwheat (oh tay!) in blackface - thought it would be a nice, final touch. In censuring Ellender, the Louisiana Supreme court agreed Ellender didn't
mean to insult blacks... Boo Boo - you out there man?! Hmmm, I may have bought that silly a** notion if Judge Dredd had just put on a old school black and white striped prison outfit with the handcuffs, but an afro wig and blackface seems to tell me that he was thinking black criminals are the only authentic criminals...but that's just me (and Boo Boo).

Oooo running long, y'all. Let me close - glossies coming soon!



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