Friday, February 11, 2005

J-Lo - The Boomerang Chick

Wassup, Y'all!

Man, I swear Jennifer Lopez is like crack, y'all. If there was ever a shorty that defined the term 'high maintenance' and unconsciously threw up every 'caution' and 'stay the hell away' sign known to man, it's our girl J-to the-L-O. But then she pops up in a new video and daaaamn old girl is foine - and right away you're thinking 'hey, maybe she's not that bad after all'...

Well see - that's the definition of a Boomerang Chick. One who works your last nerve until you finally chuck her butt out the window (figuratively, y'all). A few days or weeks later, old girl comes flying back around and you're like - Man, she's lookin good, let me holler at shorty for a second... That' s right about the time she smacks you back upside the head, popping that same yang and you chuck her butt back out the window. It's a vicious cycle that continues on until you can finally thug up and just say 'no'. It's easier said than done with some Boomerang Chicks. Our girl J-Lo clearly falls into that category.


I just checked out her newest video Get Right on iTunes and old girl is bringing it, jack - that's a hot cut and she's still got the In Living Color, Fly Girl moves percolatin'. It's enough to make a brother holler...until you realize 'Hey dummy - it's J-Lo!' - the serial heartbreaker (y'all know P. Diddy is still crying...). Check the video out if y'all got a second or two. She plays several roles which interestingly seem to match the seven different personalities she has stored in that 8.9 Daaamn Meter body of hers. See a shallow brother would wish for a way to carve out that one smoking shorty personality and chuck the rest with yesterday's fish sandwich... Big props to Mark Anthony for steppin up to the whole nine yards.

That said, let me highlight a few reactions from a set of brothers who after viewing J-Lo's rocking motion in Get Right and are likely looking out their windows waiting for the J-Lo boomerang to come back around. To wit:

Ojani Noa: Damn.
Puff Daddy/P. Diddy: Damn, damn, damn.
Chris Judd: Damn.
Ben Affleck: Damn.
Marc Anthony: Awwwwww, yeah - I'll be tappin' that tonight, jack!
The Next Knucklehead: Man, I'm a have to git with that someday...

Fellas - watch the video, close the window and move on. It'll be less painful for all of us...



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