Friday, August 06, 2004

Clowning in The Land of Lincoln

Wassup, Y'all!

Woooo I'm trippin' y'all. Today the Grand Old Party reached into their bag of dirty tricks and pulled out some keys - homeboy conservative Alan Keyes to be exact. Now y'all know as well as I do that that old 'Skeleton' Keyes would have been laughed off the Illinois Republican Primary ballot that featured a who's who of rich, white men, but now all the sudden that smooth Barack has streaked across the political firmament for the Democrats in Illinois, the Illinois republicans have found religion and can back a black candidate (who's not even from the state of Illinois). Hmmmm - sounds a tad disengenuous to me but shoot - I still live in my mama's basement, what do I know?...

Matter o' fact it's been a banner day for GW's party. Somehow the same crew that could dig up enough dirt to put J. Edgar Hoover to shame, can't figure out a way to keep an avowed racist off the ticket in Tennessee. Don't hate on them - I'm sure they tried hard. But despite their best efforts somehow James L. Hart will still be their standard bearer for congress in Tennesse's 8th district. Somewhere in Louisiana you know David Duke is dusting off the robe and gearing up for another run...

I'm looking forward to rolling the hoopty over to NYC and Madison Square for the GOP convention, y'all. I thought Reverend Al could keep folks entertained with his witticisms. Shoot - GW can hang with him any day. Case in point - GW managed to squeeze in the signing of the defense spending bill yesterday between campaign stops (which I guess means he still has time to run the country) and dropped his latest pearl of wisdom - dubbed a 'Bushism' by the liberal media. To wit:

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."
- Your Commander-in-Chief GW

Now ask youself - have truer words every been spoken? Who says GW is being misleading? Stop hatin' y'all. I say this statement is concrete proof that he's on the up and up.

In other, more relevant news - moment of silence please for the passing of Rick James. I remember busting out of L7 like it was yesterday, y'all. Brother Rick taught us young bucks many a lesson on Mary Jane, Super Freaks, and most important of all not to bring very freaky girls home to mama (ever wonder why I'm living in the basement instead of mama's tight guest room upstairs?) Rest in peace, Brother Rick. Me and the fellas will pour a little out for you next time we pass the bottle.

In honor of today's opening of 'Collateral' I'm going to hit y'all with a new Shorty of The Week a couple days early. In fact, you'll like this one y'all - it's a two-for-one (something you'll never see down at Winky's corner store). You're welcome.

Gotta jet. In honor of Brother Rick, I'm off to find some very freaky girls to console...



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