Thursday, August 18, 2005

Nike selling butts!

Wassup, Y'all!

You know, the handy thing about having a crew of homeboys is that there's at least one that you can always count on to point you to relevant glossys floating through the Internet. In this case, that would be my boy DLT and the glossy would be the best of Nike's new ad campaign that focuses on the intrinsic value of 'non traditional' female body parts like 'Tomboy Knees' and 'Thunder Thighs'. Of course, being a south side homeboy, I tend to side with Sir Mix-A-Lot and direct the majority of my short attention span to the trunk junk sported by the south side shortys (with the west side shortys closing fast) so when I saw the glossy above with the opening 'My Butt is big', I'm like - I have *got* to drop a post on this...

Now you regular column readers know I'm more a fan of the thick than the non thick when it comes to shortys. Not too thick like those Kansas City porterhouse steaks, but more like those New York prime filets. So I'm vibing with Nike's smart move to embrace a body shape that is more the norm than the Hollywood model exception. Actually, I'm thinking somehow a woman has found her way into Nike's executive suite, y'all. How else you can explain them 'stumbling' onto this truism after so long?

Also every smart homeboy knows that the place to meet woman isn't in a smoky a$$ bar where women are smoking and drinking and generally disrespecting their temples, but at the *gym* where women are working out, getting fit and fitting their workout gear. I'll be honest, I don't care if you roll into the gym looking like early day Oprah - as long as you're up in that joint doing your thing, you've got my instant respect. I think my next stop will be around the corner from the gym at the local yoga class, y'all. Man, I've seen some video and come on, now! How can you say no to hot shortys with those cute little mats doing all that flexing? And it's legal in all 50 states, y'all!

So two snaps up to Nike for being progressive and giving credit where it's so very much due. Also, twelve snaps up to gyms all across America that continue to help churn out shortys like buff heptathlete Aja Frary. Hmmmm, looking at that glossy, I'm beginning to see how that whole Nike campaign got started. Probably was a Nike marketing homeboy fronting in the gym stretching like he was getting ready to hit the weight machine (but never did) scoping the talent then finally smacking his forehead and saying, Dang! It's been right in front of my face the *whole* time! We could build an ad campaign around this and legimately post booty shots in all our stores! Edison was right, y'all - Genius is 99% perspiration and 1% inspiration...

Just do it.



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