Thursday, January 24, 2008

Shaq's wife asks "Where My Money At?"

Wassup, Y'all!

You know the problem with getting divorced? There's no privacy since the proceedings have to go through public court. Case in point, Shaquille O'Neal and his soon to be ex wife Va'Shaundya are going through a divorce and what should hit the internet but Mrs. Shaq's 'Motion to Compel Sworn Financial Affidavit'? Oh snap! This is a typical move in divorces so that one spouse can see where the other spouse is spendin' their ducats.

Naturally in Shaq's case that brother has a lot of ducats to spend so it's also only natural that according to the affidavit Mrs. Shaq 'prays this court' to have Shaq pay her attorney's 'fees, costs and suit money' and 'Grant any other relief deemed just and proper'. So before Mrs. Shaq and her attorney can zero in on a just and proper dollar amount to ask for, Shaq has to show them where he's hidin' spending his money....

Based on his $1.8 million monthly salary (which seems low to me but who am I to question Sheriff Shaq?) USA Today broke down his actual financial factuals like this, y'all:

Mortgage: $156,116
Monthly electricity (utilities): $10,065
Monthly telephone: $3,345
Month food and home supplies: $12,775
Monthly cable TV: $1,495
Monthly maid service: $22,190
Monthly gasoline and oil: $24,300 (Damn those Hummers! Got to go green, baby!)
Monthly clothing: $17,220

Ty's add on's:

Monthly Gifts: $60, 417 (how do I get on Shaq's gift list??)
Monthly Vacations: $110, 505 (Man, does Jay-Z roll like this?)

Monthly electric $10,065!?? Man, what I'm I complaining about? And how the hell can cable cost $1,495 a month? What kind of jacked up Comcast package is that? Finally, $17 grand for clothes...a month! Now I've seen Shaq's suits and I know the Goodwill doesn't charge that much even for their best stuff.

Sounds like the oke-doke is going on to me, Shaunie! My advice is to get your lawyers to dig a little deeper. After all, this is for the kidz!

The good news from all this? The NBA pays medical and dental, y'all! Now that's employer love. The bad news for Shaq? After totaling income and expenses, ol boy still has a surplus of $450 grand a month. Hmmm...subtract $449,995 a month for Shaunie and the kidz and I guess Shaq will have to trade in that Hummer for a Hyundai. I'll refer y'all back to another of my timely posts on this topic...

Man, can't we all just get along?



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