Saturday, July 16, 2005

Top Ten TV Shortys I'm Missing...6-5

Wassup, Y'all!

Now I know y'all are sitting around saying, "Hold up! Tyrone, what the hell is Apollonia's played out butt doing in your Top Ten TV Shortys list?" Relax, old girl's not on the list, she just part of my six degrees of separation leading up to my list. Now y'all will remember that in the only good movie Prince ever made - Purple Rain - we had Ms. Kotero 'purifying herself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka' (link alert - rated TV-MA for brief nudity) and besides Morris Day and Jerome Benton, Prince featured his band The Revolution (before he kicked them to the curb in '86) and the band featured two musical shortys named Wendy and Lisa and it so happens that my #6 and #5 TV Shortys are also named Wendy and Lisa. Now! Thought I couldn't pull it all together didn't you? Okay, this was really just a cheap excuse for me to drop a glossy of Apples right quick since I ain't seen her since Falcon Crest was on back in 1823...

So here we are y'all, halfway home. Let's get to it.

#6 Wendy Raquel Robinson (The Steve Harvey Show - Regina Grier) Although Wendy Robinson has a tendency to pop up in the movies all unannounced (usually as one of a pack of girlfriends that hang with a major character) old girl caught my eye as the principle of the school Steve Harvey was 'teaching music' in. I like old girl - I thought she was pretty funny in Steve Harvey, she's easy on the eyes and can work it on the dance floor. Hmmmm, those sound like some pretty moms-worthy qualities to me, y'all. If you need to get your Wendy fix right away, I see she's currently starring in Martin Lawrence's soon to be blink-to-video movie Rebound (out now). In case you're confused - 'blink-to-video' means you need to go see that joint in the next six minutes before it leaves the theaters...

#5 Lisa Bonet (The Cosby Show/A Different World - Denise Huxtable) Ahhh, the enigma that is Liliquois Moon. Lisa Bonet was by far the weirdest of the four Huxtable girls on The Cosby Show. You knew from jump that old girl had at least one wingnut rattling around in her dome. There were times I wondered exactly what it was that Bill Cosby saw in old girl to even cast her as one of his daughters (and then give her her own spin-off show!), but mine is not to reason why, y'all. So I took the shallow approach and just enjoyed looking at Lisa. I don't know - there was something exotic about her that I couldn't shake. When she showed up later in small parts in movies like Enemy of the State and Biker Boyz every time she hit the screen I was like, 'hmmm, old girl is still weird but I'm still fiending for her'. I guess she's like the TV equivalent of crack. You know you shouldn't be bothered with it but you give a try just for kicks and the next thing you know, you're fishing coins out of the mall fountain right before you head back to the alley. One thing's for sure, there's no shame in her game, especially after busting out on the buck wild tip in Rolling Stone and in the movie Angel Heart (link alert #2!). Apparently playing a character called Epiphany Proudfoot wasn't enough so she decided to change her name to Liliquois Moon in the real world. If you ask me, old girl would have been perfect for any of the female characters in the Matrix movies - *perfect*, y'all. Tell me I'm lying!

Okay - 6 down, 4 to go. I'll pause for station identification and be back in a minute with the #4 & #3 picks.



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